Dr. King and Fear

I have had to deal a lot lately with the issue of fear. Fear on all kinds of levels, from the seemingly heavy weight of responsibility on my shoulders to my intense reality of traveling in a war zone of Northern Uganda to standing in an African hospital coughing up blood. (Yeah, sorry, that was gross, but it sure as heck made me scared). I've even been facing some other kinds of adversity within broken, human relationships - and I fear conflict more than anything. I remember something that Pastor Craig has been talking a lot about lately - having thick skin and a soft heart. I remembered reading a book called Strength to Love by Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. in my Nonviolent Defense and Conflict Resolution class in college. The book is a compilation of his sermons, and he frequently talked about maintaining "a tough mind and a tender heart." So I picked the book up again and read it, which has made me feel as though I have spent the last few weeks with this hero of ours.

There is a chapter called, "Antidotes of Fear." I thought about all the various situations that have made me afraid and it was helpful and humbling to think of the outrageous amounts of fear that Dr. King must have faced. I have very little to fear compared to what Dr. King must have feared. Dr. King had thousands of people who felt threatened by his boldness - and he had real reason to fear, and fear for his life. He said, "We shall never be cured of fear by escapism or repression, for the more we attempt to ignore and repress our fears, the more we multiply our inner conflict." He spoke about how most of our fear is unnecessary. He reminds us that beacuse of God's love and care for us, we need not fear. He writes:

*The God who brought our whirling planet from primal vapor and has led the human pilgrimage for lo these many centuries can most assuredly lead us through death's dark night into the bright daybreak of eternal life*

Dr. King talked about a horribly rough week where he had been arrested and had received several threats. He was addressing a crowd of people, and an elderly, uneducated and poverty-stricken woman named Mother Pollard approached King. She noticed something was wrong with him, but King denied it. "Now you can't fool me," she said. "I knows something is wrong. Is it that we ain't doing things to please you? Or is it the white folks is bothering you?" She then said what I believe to be the most comforting words King could have received at the time. She looked directly into his eyes and said, "I don told you we is with you all the way." And then with certainty and a radiance in her eyes, she said, "But even if we ain't with you, God's gonna take care of you." To that, King reflected:

*Since that dreary night in 1956, Mother Pollard has passed on to glory, and I have known very few quiet days. I have been tortured without and tormented within by the raging fires of tribulation. I have been forced to muster what strength and courage I have to withstand howling winds of pain and jostling storms of adversity. But as the years have unfolded, the eloquently simple words of Mother Pollard have come back again and again to give light and peace and guidance to my troubled soul. "God's gonna take care of you."*

It's important for me to remember that good leaders in our past and present have faced fear with trembling and yet with faith and confidence. I was inspired and encouraged by Dr. King's stories and insight. He really was a courageous man and I am so sorry that he is not with us today.